Matthew 19:1-9 Mark 10:1-12

Matthew 19:1-9 1 When Jesus had finished these words, He departed from Galilee and came into the region of Judea beyond the Jordan; 2 and large crowds followed Him, and He healed them there. 3 Some Pharisees came to Jesus, testing Him and asking, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason at all?” 4 And He answered and said, “Have you not read that He who created them from the beginning MADE THEM MALE AND FEMALE, 5 and said, ‘FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH’? 6 “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.” 7 They said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to GIVE HER A CERTIFICATE OF DIVORCE AND SEND her AWAY?” 8 He said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses permitted you to divorce your wives; but from the beginning it has not been this way. 9 “And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.”

Mark 10:1-12 1 Getting up, He went from there to the region of Judea and beyond the Jordan; crowds gathered around Him again, and, according to His custom, He once more began to teach them. 2 Some Pharisees came up to Jesus, testing Him, and beganto question Him whether it was lawful for a man to divorce a wife. 3 And He answered and said to them, “What did Moses command you?” 4 They said, “Moses permitted a man TO WRITE A CERTIFICATE OF DIVORCE AND SEND herAWAY.” 5 But Jesus said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart he wrote you this commandment. 6 “But from the beginning of creation, God MADE THEM MALE AND FEMALE. 7 “FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER, 8 AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH; so they are no longer two, but one flesh. 9 “What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.”10 In the house the disciples began questioning Him about this again. 11 And He said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her; 12 and if she herself divorces her husband and marries another man, she is committing adultery.”

Marriage is very important to God.  The Trinity created man and woman to live united in marriage as an illustration of the unity within the diversity of the Trinity.  Paul also uses marriage as an illustration of the love Christ for the church.  These divine illustrations are important to God and they should be important to us as well.  Through marriage we have the opportunity to both experience and exemplify that which is divine.  Unfortunately, but not surprisingly, marriage has come under attack from both Satan and society.  The sexual revolution has had a devastating impact on marriage.  Many people are cohabitating without committing to one another in marriage.  Many others who do get married divorce and then remarry only to divorce again in a short period of time.  This has a devastating effect on the family, society and God’s plan for marriage.

THE PERMANENCE OF MARRIAGE: The Pharisees came to Jesus in order to test Him by asking for Him if it was lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason.  No matter what He answered, they were prepared to come back at Him with a contradictory question.  They had made allowance for divorce upon the whim of the husband.  Since women were often treated like property, if a man became tired of his wife, he could divorce her for whatever reason he like.  It was very rare for a woman to divorce her husband, because she would usually be left in destitution.  Jesus answers this question by going back to the beginning and showing how God joins a man and a woman through marriage in a “one flesh” relationship that should never be torn apart.  When God created man and woman and then joined them in marriage He was reflecting through marriage and aspect of His own image.  God is a Trinity in which three persons are united as one God.  This mystery of three in one is illustrated in the two becoming one flesh in marriage.  This is why it is so important to God for marriages to stay intact.  It reflects who He is and teaches both the husband and the wife as well as the children about who God is.  God has instituted marriage as a means of teaching us theology.  Divorce ruins that images so Jesus responds the Pharisees that what God has joined together, man should not separate.  God sees marriage as permanent.  God gave us marriage as a gift to help us know Him and make Him known.  Marriage is sacred to the Lord and should be to us as well.

THE PROHIBITION OF REMARRIAGE: The Pharisees come back to Jesus questioning what He had just taught about the permanence of marriage in light of Moses permitting a certificate of divorce.  Jesus does not back down from his position.  Instead, He insists the divorce was only granted because of the hardness of the people’s heart.  Apparently, men who found someone they liked better or simply became tired of their wife would just sent them away without giving them a certificate of divorce.  This left the woman completely vulnerable.  They could not marry anyone else or their first husband could come back and accuse them of adultery and even have them killed.  The evil heartedness caused Moses to command the husband to give a formal notice of divorce.  However, Jesus explains that remarriage was adultery.  Those who were divorcing on a whim and then getting remarried were actually committing adultery.  The only exception to that rule was when there was already adultery involved.  Jesus seems to be indicating that the innocent party of adultery could legitimately divorce and then remarry.  This is a subject of great debate with godly Bible scholars on both sides.  It seems to me that the language of the text most naturally permits remarriage in the case where one’s spouse commits adultery.  The whole reason behind giving a divorce was to permit the other spouse to remarry without risk of being accused of adultery.  However, there is a chance that the text is referring to the betrothal period as we see in the case of Mary and Joseph.  Clearly, the best option is to never divorce.  Whenever divorce takes place, the safest option is to not remarry.  If there is even a chance of being guilty of adultery, remaining single is the most secure option.  Purity in our marriage relationships must be our highest priority.  Marriage is not about satisfying my needs but about bringing glory to God.

APPLICATION: For me the clearest application of these teachings is to never consider divorce as a possibility.  My marriage is not about my happiness or even my spouse’s happiness, but God’s glory.  Those who have divorced are not to remarry or they commit adultery; so I would counsel all who have been divorced to remain single.  Even those who have been sinned against by an adulterous spouse or abandoned by an unbeliever are safest to remain single.  However, I would not break fellowship with those who are convicted and have faith that they are permitted to re marry according to these biblical exceptions but I would not perform the ceremony.